You don't want to mess with The House... we'll trash your asses

I am fully pleased with the performance of The House after last night's raid attempt. The brothers of The Hilltop House decided to attempt to drunkenly steal our composite... among other things like thongs to pretend they had scored. Last night was actually a decently opportune time to do it since there were a number of invitationals going on and The Row was relatively quiet for a Thursday night.

I was hanging out in my room and then I hear thuds and when I go look there are about four guys that climbed in via the trellis that we have on the side. Granted, they had some rope and other crap with them... it was still not an easy thing to do. It was still fairly amusing... they fell into our third floor because apparently being drunk makes you blind to the fact that you have to pass the second floor in order to get to the third floor. They were especially stupid since there were more open windows on the second floor than there were on the third floor.

I called up a few girls and since The Hot One is dating our school's star quarterback, we had no problem recruiting a few boys to help take the drunken retards down. Of course once we had them tied down in chairs with their own rope and a few random zip ties supplied by The Engineer of The House, we had to punish them. And what better way to punish them than with make up. That's right, we called up some of The Awkwards who need a little practice doing theirs so that they don't look like crazed hookers or little girls who fell into mommy's makeup drawer.

There were mixed results. Some have improved markedly in their blush and eyeshadow application while others... still need some help. In the end though, those Hilltop men didn't know what hit them. Mostly because they were drunk off their asses and by the time we were done, they were passed out. We took them back to their place and tied them to their fence. Let me tell you, the sight on the way to class this morning was totally worth it. A small crowd had gathered and I wouldn't be surprised if this makes front page news on The University's Newspaper come Monday morning.

Our success in retaliation has been going up and down The Row all day... it's great. One of The Awkwards was saying how she felt so bad doing it... but what's there to feel bad about!? They're the ones who tried to break into The House and steal things. It was totally in self-defense. Besides, it wasn't like they sent pledges to attempt to get something. If that were the case, we would have helped their pledges out, gave them brownies and cupcakes and sent them on their way with kisses on the cheek. But no, full grown bros need to learn the hard way.

Events like this make me love being part of The House.

Ah... there's nothing quite like this time in the semester...

Spring has sprung, little bambis are wandering all over the place with their thumper friends... and it's that time in the semester where hazing really gets going since everyone will be initiating spring classes soon.

I love how professional and cultural interest "fraternities and sororities" can get away with hazing so much more easily than true Greeks can. Just because they use Greek letters doesn't make them truly Greek. They're really just posers.

I was walking past The Clock Tower a few nights ago after hanging out with some friends from high school and what do I see? The Pre-Med Fraternity has their pledges in white boxers, bras, and underwear. And the initiated members were standing around with various types of bandages and red marker. I didn't really stay long enough for the hazing ritual since I was just passing through but it looked incredibly un-fun. Especially since it was about 40 last night.

And then last night, The Guitar Hero and I were coming back from The Open 24 Hour Restaurant with a few people from The Mansion and their girlfriends and as we pull into the parking lot, we see The Black Interest Sorority with a bunch of their pledges dressed all in dark clothing. I wouldn't be too surprised if they were going to go raid The Black Frat... it seems to me that the multicultural "Greek" orgs always pair up like that. And they all inter-date. It's a little incestuous if you think about it... dating your brother fraternity... Thank God The House doesn't have a brother fraternity. Wouldn't that suck if you broke up with some guy in that house and then your house did all kinds of events with them? How unnecessarily dramatic and irritating... especially if your brother fraternity was a bad one.

I hate how midterms come in waves...

I haven't written on this thing in weeks. That is only the flaw of the semester system... midterms directly after spring break.

Other than that... things have been relatively quiet. Just studying my ass off and partying when not studying. Spring is pretty mellow... Fall is madness since there's rush, football games, the majority of the Greek philanthropy events happen then... haha although I feel bad for Tinkerballerina and the rest of The Dancers since they have a lot of dance practices for their various dance groups, yet they have to repeat rush and all the pledging and whatnot for their spring class. She was bitching to me about it the other day when we were watching Top Model.

Speaking of Top Model... it's interesting to me that the contestants are not especially pretty or beautiful. Actually they are just tall, skinny, gawky, and awkward. And all of them bitch a LOT. They wouldn't be pretty at all in their shoots minus all of that retouching and special lighting... In real life, these women are sticks... just as bad as women with sweaty fat rolls. In fact, I'd love to see a plus size model win America's Next Top Model... I bet airbrushed fat rolls would look alright since it would be matte finished and all the spider veins and whatnot would be airbrushed out.

Well time to go... I have a date with Little Sis #1 tonight.