List parties and Pledges

Last night was the battle of the list parties... The Mansion vs. The Charter House. They're both known for their raging parties and everyone always wants to be on the list for them. They attract a lot of the same demographic and so it was interesting to see the bitterness build up between the two frats all week. They all came by and made announcements and at The House, they happened to make the announcement one right after the other and there was noticeable tension.

Anyway, it's standard practice for sorority girls to go to their boyfriends' frats' parties and stay there... but The Flirt decided to blackmail me by telling me that unless I showed up at his party, he wouldn't give me lab notes for the day I missed last week... ironically thanks to sleeping over at The Guitar Hero's the night before and not waking up in time for class the next morning.

I showed up at The Mansion first and hung out while The Guitar Hero was telling the new pledges what was expected from them in terms of party etiquette, bartending, and whatnot. The party got started and The Guitar Hero went upstairs to make sure the doors to all the wings of the house were locked while I waited downstairs by the bar. One of the pledges came by to offer me a drink. I hadn't met this new class yet and I haven't been around much lately for them to know who I am so he unsuspectingly started to flirt with me. He was decently cute so I pushed his pledge pin to pass the time and to force him to do something embarrassing... which in the Mansion's case is to get down on one knee, offer a compliment, and recite a poem that the older brothers make up. This pledge decided to go with the ever generic "You have a beautiful smile" as his compliment and before he could get to the poem, The Guitar Hero walked in and immediately said "That was a half-assed piece of shit compliment. Come up with a better one and do it again." The pledge then went with "You're the most beautiful girl I've ever seen." The Guitar Hero said, "That's better" while putting his arm around my waist and then added, "Too bad she's my girlfriend. Haha poor pledges... attempting to get with older women. I saw the same one go hit on The Pageant Princess later.

I stopped by The Charter House's list party and The Flirt tried his hardest to keep me there but I promised to go back to The Mansion's party. I do have to say The Charter House's party was loud and worth the visit... especially since none of the guys there associate me as taboo (unlike most of the guys at The Mansion) and they are HOT. The Pageant Princess decided to stay there and I ended up going back to The Mansion by myself to face a bitter Guitar Hero who was mad that I left in the first place. Some idiotic Barbie's Whorehouse new pledge was flirting heavily with him so I said "Excuse me", nudged her out of the way and pulled him in for a hot and heavy kiss. Freshmen pledges. Honestly don't know who the fuck they're dealing with. I can outflirt them any day of the week and I'm damn good at it. But, I was feeling somewhat benevolent and also scheming to get rid of her so I sent the pledge that hit on me earlier her way. They were happily all over each other in a corner a little while later. Fixing up couples and eliminating the annoyances. All in a day's work.

Granted, I can already tell what's going to happen. They sleep together. He doesn't recall any of it (including her name) and doesn't respond her calls/texts/facebook messages. She gets all hurt about it, cries a bunch, then gets over it the next weekend with another hookup. The young ones just don't understand that if you hook up, it's a one time thing that's just meant to satisfy the desperate and current urge and nothing more. Seriously, girls gain some self-control, invest in a good vibrator or a steady boyfriend, or be fine with hooking up left and right with no further agenda... and stop crying to me about it because I've heard and seen the same damn story too many times. It's like that part of the horror movie where everyone is screaming "don't go in there" and of course the leading lady goes in there. Half-naked, no less.