An Emu is a Large Flightless Bird... And Now It's a Brand of Fugg.

I used to like Macy's. I used to ask for gift cards there for Christmas. And then it acquired Robinson's May and began its descent to Fashion Hell.

Macy's now proudly sells Emu Australia sheepskin boots... they look almost exactly like authentic Uggs, except they're made of thinner material and apparently they're itchier. And they aren't Uggs. Fake Uggs that cost about $15-20 cheaper than real ones. What the hell. Why would I spend $130 for poorer quality ones when that tiny margin would get me the real ones? If I'm going to spend that kind of money anyway, I'd get the real Ugg boots.

I need to tell people to stop getting me gift cards to Macy's. And remind me to never walk in there again unless I just want a laugh. Honestly. Next they're going to come up with Tasmanian Devil boots or something.

Today I received an email from The Whiner. She whines about everything. This particular email was about how ridiculous it was that we sorority girls are "expected" to own designer brand clothing. And how "unnecessary" and "shallow" it all is.

I wonder why she decided to rush. It's a SORORITY. At the end of the day, we like pretty clothes and bags and shoes. Especially shoes.

But, to placate her (or at least turn down the earsplitting whining into a more tolerable low grumble) I replied that buying designer labels does not necessarily imply superficiality and an obsession with showing how much money one has. Frankly, many (not all) designer products are just crafted with more care and produced from higher quality products. Does it hurt to pay $100+ for a pair of jeans? Yes, yes it does. But it also means that I can wear said pair of jeans many, many times without fading and holes appearing. Maybe that's why she whines so much about her clothing falling apart and having to go shopping all the time... all of her stuff falls apart because it was from the Disposable Clothing, Inc. I hate their stuff. It's alright for an occasion... I imagine Houses who have themed recruitment colors shop here... but you can literally only wear your purchase once before it shrinks, stretches or develops annoying little balls of lint that need to be shaved off. You should not have to ever shave clothing unless it's a sweater that has been worn and washed a lot.

The key to frugal designer purchasing is to selectively purchase CLASSIC items that will be timeless and used a lot. Like gorgeous black Manolo Blahnik pumps or a pair of dark blue Citizens. Not that $250 fuchsia scarf shirt that will be out of style by next week.

Of course I want haute couture and secretly really want that fuchsia scarf shirt. But where would I wear it? On Friday night, I'm not going to a posh launch party or premiere of a movie I starred in, I'm probably going to go clubbing or hit up some parties on The Row. Expensive designer clothing and Cheap Beer That Tastes Worse Than Urine do not mix. And there won't be anyone sober enough to admire it for what it is anyway.